My Cat the Matchmaker
by iamRAWRkaythanks
Summary: AU. Sakura has a cat. “Oh great cat of wisdom! My lovely, purring, boy magnet! Bring me my dream boy…NOW!” Yes. He's a boy magnet. SasuSaku, SaiIno, GaaOC, NaruHina, NejiTen, ShikaTema.
1. Introduction

_**You have to leave for a deserted island in three days. What do you bring? (Four items or less)**_

_Hmm…good question. One; my iPod and its charger…does that count as two?_

…_I'll just make it be one._

_My suitcase filled with make-up and clothes, annnnnnnnd…_

_My cat. Bells._

_Why my cat?_

_Because he's my matchmaker, duh! _

…_You don't believe me?_

_WELL, FINE!_

_Let me tell you my story._

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

_**Introduction.**_

Hmmm…what to say about myself…

Hi. The name's Sakura Haruno.

_Re_**me**mber _it_. **Lo**ve it. _Kn_**ow **it. Pr_ai_**se **it. 

I'm twenty-one. Yup, just recently of drinking age.

I _loooooooove_ being twenty-one.

I have pink hair, and green eyes.

I want to be a doctor when I "grow up".

I'm currently in college.

I want to go on a cruise and a road trip.

I dislike spiders, fangirls (do you know _**how many**_ of them are at my school? Yeah, no), and my science teacher, Orochimaru.

The thing I like to quote the most… _"Yes, you __**can**__ be tank top sexy in __**7**__ days!"_

I like Pepsi, my house (c'mon, what's better then a house with a _loft _where you get to _sleep_ and a game room with tons of games? Including karaoke and DDR?), animals, my friends-

Oh. Speaking of my friends let me give you an introduction to them.

Ino Yamanaka. Platnium blond hair, sparkling baby blue eyes. Loud. My best friend since we were little. She's a shop-a-holic, and she's not as bright as me. But she gets by. Oh! Yeah! She's my shopping buddy.

"_Jesus, forehead, get a lyfe and use it to S-H-O-P!"_

Next up is Hinata Hyuuga. She's got navy-blue hair and pearl-white/lavender eyes. They're really pretty. She's the third smartest in our group (yes, we all took an IQ test. I landed second. Hinata was third. Ino was last. But that's OK, we still love her), but she's really shy. She has this crush on my male best friend, Naruto, and faints/blushes/stutters whenever he's around (which is a lot). I call it the 'Nervous Hinata Hyuuga Breakdown'. She likes to read and just _hang out_ with me a lot, which is fine with me. She's my library buddy.

"_You guys…maybe you should stop…everyone's looking at us…" "What's wrong with that, Hinata?" "…Ino, I thought you said you wanted no one to notice us…" "…Oh. Right."_

Then we have Tenten. She's actually my adopted sister. She's cool…no, she doesn't live with me in my house. But that's OK. She's got brown hair she keeps in two buns and chocolate brown eyes. She's the fifth smartest in our group. She's-after me and Ino-one of the loudest in our group. She loves sports, as do I. Any sport? She's there, dragging me along. Not that I mind. I have to keep in shape, don'tcha know?

"_When in doubt, run screaming around like a chicken without a head, and hope no one you-just-might-like-a-tiny-bit notices you. But, if he/she does, act like you don't really care. If they _truly_ like you, they'll see underneath your weirdness…got that, Saku?"_

Next? Temari no Sabaku. She has dirty blond hair that she keeps in four ponytails and green eyes. She's been friends with me since sophomore in high school. She's the fourth smartest in our group. She's smart, and a bit violent. She's the one who deals with the fangirls who get in our way. She's another sports buddy with me 'n' Tenten, but she's my movie buddy. She's, like, _OBSESSED_ with movies. As am I. Any movie…we're there.

"_Listen, __**girlie**_**. **_You think you're ALL THAT, but in reality, you're just below me 'n' my friends. So back off, 'kay, little one? If I hear you insult one of my friends again, you'll __**wish**__ you'd never stepped foot in this place. Oh, and you probably won't have to. What can I say? I have...__**connections**__."_

And last, but DEFINITELY not least, I have to include her…Sia Uchiha. The smartest in our group. She's a seriously _goofball_. She's SO random, it makes all of us laugh. If we're sad, all she has to say is 'pickles' and we're _instantly_ clutching our stomachs, laughing so hard. She has black hair and forest green eyes. Her secret talent-believe this or not-only second after being random, is surfing. Yes, ya heard right, surfing. I don't know a _thing_ about it, but, apparently, she's really good. She's won quite a few trophies for it.

"…_Uh. Right. Now I have to say something funny, sarcastic, and random…WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, GOD? …Oh. You do. Fine then…I AM THE EPITOME OF RANDOM BLANKETS! Happy now?"_

Four of us work together at a café (Sia, Ino, Hinata, and myself).

Along with Naruto, Kiba Inuzuka (my ex) (we're still good friends though) Shikamaru Nara, one of Ino's OTHER (besides me) childhood best friends, and Neji Hyuuga, Hinata's cousin.

Tenten doesn't work there, but she has a _serious_ crush on Neji.

Temari used to work there.

Until she got fired.

For "being mean" to one of the customers.

Hey, she was just protecting Hinata!

Oh, yeah. Temari, Tenten, and Sia are twenty-two. Hinata and Ino are twenty-one like mwa.

So yeah, that's me and my friends…

* * *

WAIT!

I forgot.

I have a cat.

He's an AMAZING cat. Completely insane, but, like owner like pet, I guess.

His name is Bells.

And he's a boy magnet.

Seriously.

I'm not even playin' with you.

He's become our god.

Like Sia once said,

"_Oh great cat of wisdom! My lovely, purring, boy magnet! Bring me my dream boy…NOW!"_

Five minutes later, we bumped into Sia's next boyfriend.

They stayed together for a year.

A _year, _people.

He even got me my ex, Kiba-even though Kiba hates cats.

Seriously.

My cat jumped out of my arms. Ran around the corner. Glomped Kiba.

When everything was all sorted out, he gave me his number.

"_Just in case_," He'd said.

Riiiiiiight.

We stayed together for almost a year.

Last year, Bells even got Temari her swear-a-holic boyfriend Hidan-they only stayed together for three months, but, while it lasted, it _lasted_.

Oh. Yeah-you don't want to know the details…_trust me_.

My Bells got ALSO got Ino with her most serious boyfriend-Kankuro.

They lasted…wait for it…wait…

_Two years_.

(OK, so it helped that Kankuro is Temari's brother, but, whatever)

This is no scam, people.

Bells even got _Hinata_ her ex boyfriend _Shino_ (which was before she met Naruto). And they lasted for one and a half years.

See-I'm telling the truth.

We even have a _**code**_ for using Bells. Seriously.

…OK, it also has to deal with other stuff in our friendship, but, whatever.

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

Our code is _simple_…ish.

That's what makes it easy to remember and live by.

Three sections.

Six rules per section.

And bam.

The first section is _**Love**_.

Only because Ino has a lot of influence over us, no matter what we all say.

Rule 1 is mine.

_And you will, no matter what, stay by your friends, no matter what your significant other at ANY point in time says. Best friends are the best connection you have to the world. So…if they say something's wrong with him, girl, SOMETHING'S WRONG!_

Example A.

Tenten went out with this boy…Rock Lee.

OH MY GOD, MY EYES!

Green spandex.

Bowl cut hair.

Gigantic eyebrows.

Shudder.

Sia shook her by the shoulders five days in it (we SWORE we'd give him a chance) and told her…

"_Dump this boy before I kick you out of the group._"

Now, she doesn't have that power (that's me, Temari, and Ino. I guess you could call us the _leaders_) but it scared Tenten out of her wits.

So, she 'obeyed' (Only because she didn't know that Sia didn't have the power) and dropped Lee.

You're probably thinking, _'That's mean_" but, seriously…

Green spandex.

Always saying 'youth'.

Bowl cut.

Bushy eyebrows.

…Good, you're getting the idea.

* * *

Rule 2 is Ino's.

_No matter what your girls say, you are entitled to a __**FIVE DAY**__ period to try your new boy toy-I mean, boyfriend out. This is also known as your grace period. DON'T FORGET TO HAVE FUN!_

Example B (though Example A is just as good in this case).

Sia went out with a boy named Zaku.

Worst decision of her life, TRUST me.

We _graciously_ extended to her the five-day grace period.

Then told her to kick him to the curb.

She ignored us, and…

Well.

Let's just say he broke her heart.

So Temari did what any good friend would do (even though we told her, listen, Sia, HE IS BAD!) and kicked his ass.

Problem solved.

* * *

Rule 3 is Hinata's.

_Your friends, believe it or not, have a good eye. So don't be afraid to tell them who your current crush is. They know a whole lot more then you think they do._

Example C.

Hinata.

Naruto.

Must I say more?

He is SOOOOO right for her.

Now, if only he would stop being so dense and finally _see_ the reason why she always faints around him!

* * *

Rule 4 is Tenten's.

_Love is a dangerous game. SO…please…girlfriend, check out the playing field before you dive into the game._

I think that's pretty self explanatory…

WHAT? YOU'RE CONFUSED?

Oh, fine.

Example D.

Temari. And…

OK, I'm not going to even say his name, I'm _sooooo _scared-

What? OK, fine.

Kabuto.

Oh god.

_Time for a shudder_.

Yeah.

Turns out he was dating _five other girls_ at the same time.

When she found out, she kicked him in the balls.

Way ta go, Tema!

* * *

Rule 5 is Temari's.

_Always consult your girls during while you're dating-especially during the five day grace period. _

Example E (referring back to Example A, here).

Yes.

I'm still upset about Tenten and Lee.

During that week, we barely saw Tenten.

'Til we bombarded her house, dragged her to the mall, got her some new clothes, and sat her down at a burger place and gave her a stern-talking to.

You don't want this punishment; _trust me_ (I've had to go through it too. The shopping was OK, but the stern-talking-too wasn't).

* * *

Rule 6 is Sia's.

_In relationships, there must always be a certain level of trust. You MUST trust your partner (unless you KNOW something is wrong) and you have to let them trust you. Also, you need good communication._

A-_hem_. I'm not going to bother with the example.

…It will embaress me.

And anyways, I need to get to the mall (where I'm meeting my girls) with Bells, because I have a feeling Mr. Right is waiting.

…See? Bells even transfers over his psychic powers to me!

**_XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX_**

**_Author's Notes a.k.a Everything You Ever Wanted 2 Know and Everything You Didn't Want 2 Know About This Fic:_**

**Ummmm...Hi.**

**Yes, here I am again and yes, this is a new ongoing fic.**

**Why is this here? Well, first of all, _Camp Month_ only has one more chapter and I'm hastily writing the remainder of the _Fainting_ oneshots.**

**And, besides, this WOULD NOT leave me ALONE, and it's almost finished. Yayz...so...no worries about me being really hasseled...ish.**

**So...what can I say about this fic?**

**It was _MEANT_ to be a oneshot but it kept growing...and it will probably have eight chapters. And the chapters are each like their own little oneshot (except for this one).**

**All the chapters' lengths will be inconsistent, but, eh, what's done is done.**

**It's a..._little_ different then my normal style but, before I came to ffnet, I was a total Sakura-narrative-writer. When I got here, I kinda...dropped that. I've been reading some Sakura-narrative fics lately and was inspired to pick it back up. Eh, whatever. I think it's turning out _really well_.**

**(This fic was inspired by lots of different fics. Damn, I can't name them all and I certainly couldn't count them all!)**

**_My Cat the Matchmaker_ has been my baby for a while now. You know that oneshot I was complaining about? (...you don't? Oh, well, it was on my prof...eh whatever) Yeah, this is it. It certainly has..._evolved_. -sweatdrop- You know stories, they take themselves and charge off in a completely different direction then what you were aiming for. Er, hello, here's one of those kind right here! -points-**

**Anyways...****I'd like to think a certain friend/reviewer, _sheknowswhosheisthankyouveryMUCH!, _because while I was writing this (and...while I'm still writing this) I have been constantly "complaining-ish' about it.**

**Eh, so yeah.**

**THANKS A BUNCH DOHl!**

**Also, this was the beginning and I haven't changed it that much but...while I was writing I was having lots of difficulties. Ya see, I'm used to writing in Sia's perspective so I'm sorry if, in the future of this fic or in this 'chapter' you get a little confused. Once I'm done writing the entire thing (and posting it) I'll go back and 'fully edit' it...I think.**

**Eh. Whatever-if I get to it, I'll letcha know.**

**OK, so it's a little late to say this but WARNING: THIS STORY INCLUDES AN OC/SIBLING INSERT that goes by the name of Sia Uchiha. She's my baby. Most of my readers (god I sound like a frickin' magazine write now, shi-eesh) know about her but if you don't, please feel free to contact me and ask about her! **

**So...this is a new type of style for me. I thought I'd give it a shot-it's going to transfer from narrative at the beginning to dialogue and then narrative at the ending again (probably-ish).**

**Where did I get this idea? Good question. I have a cat, who's kindasorta_maybe _spoiled like Bells. Yeah. The rest came to me in a dream (I'm being totally serious).**

**So...yeah. I hope you all like (d) it and will continue reviewing and reading as I get the chapters up!**

**Please leave your thoughts, because...if I don't get any reviews, I'm going to remove this fic and I won't continue.**

**I'm serious.**

**I am NOT, I repeat, I am NOT accepting flames, alrightie?**

**Good.**

**SO STAY AWAY! I HAVE A FIRE EXTINGUISHER! SO WATCH OUT!**

**Yeah.**

**...Wow I just rambled a lot there, about absolutely nothing...OK, it wasn't NOTHING, but...**

**I am now going to stop talking.**

**Ja ne,**

**Lady Maybelle of Confusion**

**P.S. One more thing, so you all don't eat me out-each chapter is based around a different couple. SaixIno is next chapter. Sorry, SasuSaku fans, SasuSaku doesn't appear until the seventh chapter, but it's going ot be a long-ish chapter, kay-kay?**


	2. Finding Ino's Catch

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

_**Finding Ino's Catch**_

I sigh, running my hands through my hair as Bells meows constantly, rubbing around my ankles.

"Bells, stop that!" I say, waiting for the phone to ring Or something...

Christ, I was bored.

_Brrring, brrring._

I pick it up. "Hello?"

"SAKURA! DOHLING-"

"Sia. Don't EVER say that again."

"…Fine. But-we need you down here! At the mall! Ino is getting flirted with!"

"WHAT?" I say, on my feet, grabbing Bells, sunglasses, and anything else I might need.

Ah. Right. My wallet.

"Yes, yes, yes! Hurry!"

"I'm hurrying!" I say. "See ya soon."

'LATER!" Sia chirps into the phone.

I swing my shoulder bag on and race down the stairs, Bells in tow. I slam the front door open, lock it, race down the steps, and jump into my car, placing Bells on the passenger seat. I buckle my seatbelt, and drive down the road.

Ino.

Being flirted with.

This hasn't happened in two months, and that's coming from Miss Flirtalicious.

(Bells was taking a well-deserved vaca, thankyouveryMUCH!)

I pull into the mall, parking and hopping out of my car, grabbing Bells and my bag.

And I see them.

And the guy Ino is flirting with.

_Ooooh…he's hot,_ I think, then shake my head.

Unspoken, unwritten rule 500: No going after your friend's bait.

"Saku!" Tenten says, waving at me.

"Hey, Ten," I say, sitting besides Temari. Everyone turns their attention away from the soda machine where Ino is currently flirting, and look at me.

"You should've seen earlier," Temari snickers. "She was flushing bright re-oh, look, there she goes again."

Ino looks happier then I've seen her look in months.

"Hmmm," I say.

"I think she's more in-tune when she's gotta man," Sia says. "What do ya think, Bells?"

He stares at her.

"…" Temari stares. "Is something wrong with Bells, Saku?"

"He just woke up," I reply.

'…That explains it."

'Mrrrrrrowwwww," Bells puts in his two cents, and rather loudly too.

Ino's head snaps towards us, and she smiles when she see Bells.

Her companion looks at us too.

The next thing I know, she's by our side, holding his wrist.

"Sakura!" She says.

"Heh. Ino," I say.

She lets go of his wrist and leans down to pet Bells. "Heeeeeey there, buddy," She coos.

Bells hisses, but he's not looking at Ino.

He's staring straight at her male companion.

Ino looks at Bells, then turns to the male behind her. "Sorry," She says. "But if the cat doesn't approve…"

"Really?" He hisses. "A _cat_?"

"Cat's have really good personality judging," I say with an innocent look on my face. "If it doesn't like you, then…well. You have that figured out, don't you?"

He stalks off without another word, and Ino sits beside me.

"He was really cute too," She sighs.

"Ino," Hinata says, ever the optimist. "There are plenty other fish in the sia."

"Fish are gross," Ino says, wrinkling her nose. "I prefer sharks, thankyouveryMUCH!"

"Oooooooh, she likes 'em when they bite!" Temari smirks.

"I hate it when you talk in that accent," Ino growls as the rest of us burst out laughing.

"Inoooo, don't be a spoil sport, that was funny!" Sia giggles.

"WHAT? SHUT UP!" Ino yells, standing up and smacking her palm on the table. "You-"

"Ooooh, Ino, watch your mouth," I can't resist joining in, smirking as Ino blushes at me furiously.

"BILLBOARD BROW!"

I stand up too. "SHUT UP BOAR!"

"FOREHEAD GIRL!"

"PORK CHOPS!"

"COWARD!"

"JERK!"

"You GUYS!" Hinata half-shouts, grabbing both of us and sitting us down. "E-NOUGH!"

"That turns me on, Hinata," Sia jokes, winking.

"S-s-Sia-chan!" Hinata gasps.

"…Do you take EVERYTHING seriously?" Temari asks.

"I guess she does," I joke, looking at my watch.

"…OMG!" I scream, grabbing Bells and my purse.

"What?" Tenten asks, confused.

"It's twelve thirty!"

"So?" Ino says."

"WE HAVE WORK, FREAKS!"

"…AW SHIT!" Sia stands up and races to her car.

Dammit.

We're all gonna be late.

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

"SORRY WE'RE LATE!" Sia, Ino, and I yell as we burst in through the back doors.

"Yeah, sorry!" Hinata says, following us in.

"Troublesome,' groans Shikamaru Nara.

"SHUT UP SHIKA!" Ino screeches at him, slamming a book on his head.

"…Ino."

"Yeah forehead?"

"Where did you find that book?" I ask, placing Bells in his own little cat bed.

…What? Even my _boss_ loves him.

"I dunno. Somewhere…" She shrugs.

_Sweatdrop_.

"Ah, you girls are finally here!" My boss, Iruka, comes through the doors. "I'm glad you coul-BELLS!"

And he went to pet my cat.

See? I told YA!

"Hi Iruka," The four of us girls chorus. 'We're gonna go change now."

"Wanna do that in front of me, Sakura?" Kiba Inuzuka says, winking.

"Shut up, dog breath. You had your chance."

"Mrrrrrow," Bells agrees.

Kiba just smirks and the four of us girls go into the back.

"Why did you two break up, Sakura? You two were such a cute couple." Sia asks.

"…Sia."

"Yeah Saku-chan?"

'You ask me that, like, once every day."

"I know. But I always forget."

I roll my eyes.

"OK Sia. Here I go…WE. HAD. TOO. MANY. DIFFERENCES. You get that?"

"…Nope."

I slammed her over the head with Ino's book.

"Ow, Saku-chan, that hurt!" Sia whines.

"Good-that means I'm doing my job correctly," I scowl. "AND STOP CALLING ME SAKU-CHAN!"

Our uniforms at our café-Lil' Fire Corner Café-are basically up to us. The color scheme and accessories, at least. The basic uniform is a vest, a long-sleeve white shirt that has bell sleeves, a skirt, and Converse.

I wear a white long sleeve, a black-and-red checkered skirt, a red-and-black striped vest, black Converse, and red legwarmers that cover the top of my Converse. My hair is in pigtails, with black-and-red ribbons weaved through my locks.

The other three girls wear the same outfit as me, but their color schemes are different. Sia has dark green and gold, Ino has sky blue and lavender, and Hinata has silver and midnight blue.

"But it fits you," Sia pouts.

"SHUT UP!"

"Alright. Kiba, Neji-"

"WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?" Ino screams, waving a spatula at Neji and Naruto, who appeared out of nowhere.

"Calm down, Ino."

"Sorry, Iruka."

"Anyways, like I was saying, Kiba, Neji, Sakura, Sia, Naruto, and Hinata get the waiter positions. "Ino you're welcoming people, and Shikamaru, you've got the cash register."

" 'Kay, Iruka!"

"Hnn."

"SCHWEET!"

"YES SIR!" Salute.

"NARUTO YOU IDIOT!" _Punch_.

"Y-y-yes I-i-iruka."

"Gosh darnit!"

"Troublesome."

We all glared at Shikamaru.

"Troublesome."

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

"Hey, Ino."

'Forehead? Do you think Iruka will let us switch?" She asks.

"Why?"

"Because Kankuro is headed this way with his friends."

"Hmmm…" I say. "Well, you don't want to end up serving them, do ya?"

She blanches.

"HELL NO!"

Sia pops up out of nowhere. "Yo!"

"HOW THE HELL-" Ino and I say as the door opens and in comes seven people of the male gender.

"OMG! It's Shino! Someone has to let Hinata know!" I whisper.

Ino buffs me over the head.

"OW WHAT WAS THAT FOR PIG?" I scream.

"Shut your trap, billboard brow! You know perfectly well what that was for!"

Sia pushes both of us aside. "Hello! Seven, is it?"

"Hnn," says a male with black-blue hair that sticks up in the back and deep, mesmerizing black eyes.

"…SASUKE?" Sia says. "What are YOU doing here?"

"…Sia?" He says, blinking.

"You two know each other?" Ino says.

"DUH! He's my little brother!" Sia near-screams.

"…Brother?" I say. "Wow. Didn't expect that."

"DUH FOREHEAD!"

"SHUT UP PIG!"

'MAKE ME BILLBOARD BROW!"

"STUPID BOAR!"

"YOU LITTLE-"

The seven males watch us in amusement as Ino and I begin to squabble. Out of nowhere, Naruto appears.

"TEME!" And he attacks Sasuke.

"Stop dobe!" Sasuke growls as he's pinned to the ground. Ino and I stop fighting and stare.

I burst out laughing.

"Hey, what's all the commotion?" Kiba drawls, walking over to us.

"Kiba?" Shino says.

"Yo, Shino. What are you doin' here?" Kiba asks.

Shino shrugs.

"NARUTO-KUN! WILL YOU PLEASE GET BACK HERE AND HELP ME?" Hinata screams from a table.

Naruto jumps up and races away.

"Coming, Hinata-chan!"

"Well well well. If it isn't Sasuke Uchiha," Neji drawls, leaning against the podium-thing by the front door.

Sasuke's eyes narrow. "Neji Hyuuga," He growls.

"Jeez, stop fighting, Neji!" I say, and slap his arm. "Everyone, get back to work! I'll take care of these seven!"

"Whatever." And everyone vanishes except me and Ino and the seven males.

"Jeez I really wish I could learn how to do that," Ino says.

"Shut up boar."

'Forehead girl."

'Pork chops," I smirk over my back as I lead the seven males to their table.

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Ino screams at the top of her lungs. "I'LL GET YOU BACK FOR THAT, FOREHEAD, DO YOU HEAR ME, WIDE EXPANSION OF SKIN ON THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD! I'LL GET YOU! JUST YOU WAIT…I'LL GET YOU!"

_**

* * *

**_

My Cat the Matchmaker

* * *

"ORDER UP!" yells one of our chefs.

"Troublesome," Shikamaru mutters. "Sakura-"

"I know, I know, I'm on it, you lazy bum," I say, 'tsk' ing as I go by.

"Hey, hey, Sakura," Ino mutters in my ear. "…There's a REALLY HOT guy at your table."

"Which one?" I ask. "There was about three of them."

"Short brown hair…"

"Oh. Sai."

"…How do you know his name?"

I stare at her. "I'm their waitress, hun. I overhear their conversations…"

"Oh. Right," Ino says. "Anyways, billboard, he's REEEEEEEEEALLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE cute and-"

"Lemme guess. You want Bells to work his magic?"

"PLEASE, Saku?" She asks, begging.

"Hmmm. You're begging…that's new…fine," I say. "But if Bells turns him down…"

She rolls her eyes. "Eh whatever."

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

"MRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!"

"…There's a cat," Sasuke says.

"Duh, Uchiha," The red haired one (I think his name is Gaara) smirks.

"Whatever, Sabaku."

Wait…did he just say _Sabaku_?

That would make him a relation of Temari…

"Oh, I'm so sorry," I say, picking up Bells off their table.

"INO! COME TAKE THE DAMN CAT!" I screech.

"Sure," Ino hurries over.

Before she can take him from me, Bells meows and hops out of my arms and into Sai's lap.

_Success_, I think, smirking at Ino, who's blushing like a freaking madwoman.

_Bells approves_.

I whisper into her ear before I leave to go take care of another of my tables, "Don't forget to have him come pick you up tonight."

She growls, and swats me.

I just smirk at her.

**_XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXUntiXX_**

**_End Notes._**

**Oh, wow. Talk about a chapter with serious plotholes. -sweatdrop-**

**And, yes, cafes in their world (which every one they currently are in) allow pets!**

**FOR THE SAKE OF THE STORY, LET IT BE! **

**Thank you, my THREE reviewers. Yes, I said THREE. Isn't that such a pitiful number, THREE?**

**Maybe I'll get more reviews for this chapter... (hinthint)**

**Until I can fix the story, I am just going to fix the plotholes here.**

**_Why Kankuro and Ino didn't react: _Hmmm...Temari's brother, Temari's friend...hmmm...They've probably met about a thousand times since they've broken up...**

**_The Whole Shino/Hinata Thing: _Maybe Shino doesn't have super-hearing! And, _hey_, who pays attention to _NARUTO_ anyways? And Hinata's busy working, like the good little waitress she is!**

**OK, now onto apologize about the lack of SaixIno-ness. **

**-sob- I tried, seriously. I wa just getting tired of the chapter and was looking for a way to wrap it up...this is the chapter where I learned...ish. Yeah...OK so SaixIno will show up at the end again, OK? So...please don't hurt me... -stares nervously at pitchforks and gulps-**

**I should probably go to school for anti-OOCness...and to learn how to insert Sai into chapters... -sob-**

**As for this chapter's complete randomness: I hate introduction chapters; they are SO messy and UGH don't even get me started on character set-up. **

**-sweatdrops-**

**Anyways, I hope you review.**

**YES. EACH ONE OF YOU THAT IS READING THIS: REVIEW, DAMMIT!**

**I get pissed when I don't get reviews. -eyes narrow-**

**Next Chapter: NejixTenten-ness. Yayz!**

**No flames, and, once MORE: **

**P**

**L**

**E**

**A**

**S**

**E**

**R**

**E**

**V**

**I**

**E**

**W**

**!**

**Ja ne,**

**Lady Maybelle of Confusion**


	3. Hiya Mind Holding This Cat For Me?

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

_**Hiya. Mind Holding this Cat for Me?**_

"But…Sakura-"

"Nope."

'But-"

"Take it."

'But-"

"OH, FOR KAMI'S SAKE, TENTEN, JUST TAKE THE DAMN CAT!" I snarl, shoving Bells in her arms. "Take it, and go walk inside there and _talk to him_, for kami's sake!"

"…Sakura, you already said 'For Kami's Sake'," Sia points out.

"SHUT UP, SIA!"

"But-"

I spin around to face Tenten one more time. "Tennie," I say. "It's not that hard. Walk in there with Bells, go up to Neji at the counter, and explain to him that I _wanted Iruka and everyone else at the café today to enjoy Bells' company, but I'm sorry I couldn't make it because I'm sick today._ Do you get that?"

"…Yes, but…"

"NO BUTS! JUST DO IT, DARNIT!" I scream.

"OK, OK, jeez, you don't have to scream," She says, grabbing Bells and heading into the café. "Stupid sis."

I sigh. "Finally, she's got attitude!"

"…Did she just call me STUPID??"

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

_Tenten POV._

I bite my lip nervously, heading towards the counter.

"Tenten?"

Oh. Wow. There he is…looking as fine as ever.

No! Dammit, get a hold of yourself! You're not called the sports queen for nothing…

"H-hey Neji," I say, smiling.

Er…kinda.

He smirks at me.

I feel my knees buckle.

_No! Stay strong!_

"What can I do for you?" He asks, still smirking.

I motion to Bells with my head.

He looks confused.

"…Why do you have Bells?"

"Sakura asked me to bring him," I say, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

_Fudge…this isn't going to end well._

"…I thought Sakura was sick," He says.

_He's soooooooo handsome…!_

"Yeah…well…she sprouted some nonsense about 'even though she was sick she wanted Iruka and the rest of ya to enjoy Bells' company' and 'she didn't want to get him sick anyways so it was really no big deal'," I say, throwing a mental party in my head that I didn't forget.

"Why come to me with Bells, though?" He says, still smirking.

_God…so handsome…_ I think.

"You're the first person I saw who I knew fairly well," I blurt.

He smirks.

"…So…what do you want me to do?"

'Take Bells," I state.

_Well…that's obvious…_

He stares at me, and then smirks.

…_That doesn't look good._

I blush.

"Fine," he says smugly. 'But you have to do two things for me," He scoops Bells out of my arms.

"First," He says smoothly, dumping Bells on the counter. Bells sits down at stares at the two of us with unblinking eyes. "Go out with me tonight."

I flush deeply.

"That won't be a problem, right?" He asks, smirking at me.

"N-no."

"Good. And second…" His right hand grabs my shirt and pulls me closer to him and, somehow, over the counter, we kiss.

Oh, and what a kiss it is. Fireworks and everything.

He releases me, smug smirk still on his face. "…You have to kiss me. Again. Right now."

I smile. "That won't be a problem either."

He smirks again, and we both lean in.

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

"Well?" We all wait impatiently as she exits the café.

"Exhibit A," She says, and holds up a ticket. "One ticket to the movies. I'm going tonight, with Neji."

"OH MY GOD!" We all squeal. Well, four of us.

Hinata is just smiling.

"And…for my final act…" She grins.

"We kissed. Twice."

We all went nuts.

"…Sakura…?"

We turn around.

"Oh, fuck, it's Iruka! RUN!!"

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**_The Psychaotic Author's Notes:_**

**Hiya, everyone. This one's shorter then the last two chapters, but, since Neji and Tenten (basically) already know each other, I thought that it was fine the way it was.**

**Poor Tenten. Sakura and Neji are so demanding, lol.**

**xD. I enjoyed writing this chapter. Everytime I got writer's block for this story I would go back and read this chapter,**

**burst out laughing,**

**and immediatly start writing again.**

**"And for my final act...We kissed. Twice."**

**Lol.**

**Tenten and Neji are such a f-u-n couple to write! They're personalities make them (sometimes...for me) really easy to write!**

**AS LONG AS THEY'RE NOT WITH LEE OR GAI... -shudder-**

**God.**

**I'm going into shock.**

**Please excuse me...**

**-twitchs-**

**Alright.**

**I'm better now.**

**Please leave your comments in a review.**

**Yes, you.**

**The one who is reading this.**

**But no flames, thanks!**

**Ja ne,**

**Lady Maybelle of Confusion**


	4. I Brought Home Your Cat, But

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

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_**I Brought Home Your Cat, but...**_

"So, how'd your date with Sai go last night, Ino?" I ask, inspecting my toenails, which I just painted. "I never got to ask you today when we were setting Tenten up with Neji…that was a pity…hmmm…" I pick up the cotton balls littered all over my bathroom counter, throwing them into the trash can. _"Score…!"_ I think to myself as I adjust the phone that's sitting in between my shoulder and my cheek. "Not that part where I set up Neji and Tenten; that was genius on my part."

"FANTASTIC!" She squeals, ignoring the rest of my whole spiel. Not that I care... "We kissed. Like, five times."

"…Five times? That's it?" I ask, teasing.

"SHUT UP SAKU! I want to take this relationship slow!" She huffs into the phone.

"I know; I'm just teasing ya. Hey…who should we set up next-Temari or Hinata?"

"How about setting up yourself first, before ya go buttin' into others' love lives?"

"Shut UP, PORKY!"

"Heh. I dunno…but who would we set 'Mari up with? I know Hina would obviously be set up with Naruto, but-"

"Ino," I ask.

"Hmm?"

"I'm only going to ask this once, OK?"

"Mmm-hmmm."

"ARE YOU _BLIND_?"

"…What kinda question is _that_, forehead?"

"Have you NOT seen the way Temari looks at Shikamaru?"

"Shikamaru…OH! MY! GOD! FOREHEAD! MARI LIKES SHIKA??" She gasps.

"She finally gets it," I mutter.

"What was that, FOREHEAD?"

"Nuthin'."

"That's what I thought," She sounded smug.

"…SO…what do you think?"

"…It could work, I guess…" She muses. "I just never would've thought of Temari and _Shikamaru, _my childhood _male_ best _friend_."

"I think they would be perfect for each other," I say, putting my foot on the floor of my bathroom and hoisting the other onto the tile counter, taking my phone and switching it onto speaker.

Ah. Much better.

"Hmmm…I suppose someone does need to teach her how to relax…and someone needs to teach him how to be more active."

"Now you're seeing things my way, boar."

"So how do we go about this, forehead?" Ino asks.

"Hmmm…I need to think about this. I'll get back to ya tomorrow."

"OK. Bye," She says.

"Bye."

_Click_.

I really still can't believe that Ino didn't see that 'Mari liked Shikamaru earlier.

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

"I'm coming!" I holler, pounding down the stairs to my front door. I threw it open.

"Oh. Hey Hina-you brought Bells!" I say, gasping.

"I ran into Naruto-kun on the way home," She says. "I offered to take Bells home and he…and he…"

She was turning red again.

I sigh. "Why don't you come in Hina?"

"Oh no, I-"

"Stay the night."

"I couldn't-"

"PLEEEEEEEAAAAAASSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEE?" I beg, eyes wide.

"…Fine," She murmurs.

"YA!"

She walks through the door, with Bells, and I shut it behind her.

Bells jumps down from her arms and runs up the stairs to the loft. Even though he disappears from sight, we can hear him going nuts.

"I need to call my dad," She says.

"Sure. While you're doing that-tea or hot chocolate?" I ask.

"tea please."

"Green?"

"Yes please."

"'kay."

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

When I returned, she was just finishing her phone call. I had green tea for her, hot chocolate for me.

"Father said I could stay," Hinata says. "Thanks."

"No prob," I say, flashing her a smile. "Now…mind telling me why you flushed red in my doorway?"

At the mention of this, she turns red again. 'Well, you see, Sakura-chan…Naruto-kun and I…we…"

"Yes Hina?" I say. I'm a very patient person.

When it comes to Hinata.

"…we sort of…accidentally…"

I wait.

"…kissed."

"Oh. Is that all?"

Wait.

Pause.

Rewind.

Push Play.

My jaw drops to the floor.

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?"

She blushes furiously. "W-we k-kissed."

"I know that part. HOW?"

"I-I don't remember," She continues to blush.

"Wow…Hina…this is big!"

"I-I know."

'Did…he…kiss back?" I ask.

"Well…you see Sakura-chan…it kinda became a…well…I guess a make out session."

"Oh. My. God. You, Hinata Hyuuga, _made out_ with Naruto Uzumaki? Pinch me, I must be dreaming," I say, pretending to faint.

"That's not funny, Sakura-chan,' She frowns.

"No…it's not…I'm sorry. Well…what happened afterwards?" I ask.

"…We're going out tomorrow," She flushes.

"Ohmy_god_. Really? Like, seriously?" I ask, eyes alight and hands folded together.

She nods. "Mmmmhmmm."

I look up at Bells, who's watching us from the loft.

Y'know, I'd almost swear that he has a smirk on his face…

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**_The Long Rant at the End of the Chapter that Every Author Does:_**

**I officially hate FFnet documents. They are SO annoying!**

**RAWR!**

**Hi again.**

**xD.**

**I really like this chapter, ever though Naruto NEVER shows up.**

**It was still cute anyways, right?**

**-crickets chirping-**

**...Right...?**

**-wolf ears appear- **

**-wolf ears droop-**

**Er. Anyways-I somehow find this chapter totally happening. Naruto being forced to take Bells to Sakura, Hinata running into him somewhere, Hinata offering to take Bells, being totally flustered, Naruot thinking it was cute, the two making out, Hinata taking Bells to Sakura, Sakura inviting Hinata to stay the night, Hinata insisting that she call her father to see if it was OK, Sakura wriggling the story out of Hina.**

**xD.**

**Can't you?**

**...Gawd, I am WAAAAAY to hyper for this time of night. -yawns-**

**Hinata is so Hinata-ish in this chapter.**

**I lurv it.**

**xD.**

**Please leave your thoughts in a review.**

**But no flames, alrightie?**

**Ja ne,**

**Lady Maybelle of Confusion**


	5. Can I Have Bells Back Now, Please?

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

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_**Can I have Bells Back Now, Please?**_

The next day, after Hinata left my place, I dash up the stairs and call Ino.

"Ino."

"Yes?"

"We're setting up Temari and Shikamaru."

"Why not Hina and-"

"They're already together."

"_What?_" She shrieks.

"Naruto was returning Bells to me, he ran into Hina along the way, things happened, the two kissed, causing them to make out, Hina brought Bells home, stayed the night, and told me the story."

"_OMG._ This is _BIG_."

"Yes. Very."

"…So we're onto 'Mari and Shika?"

"Yup. The big plan will be tomorrow…you gotta get Shika there, 'kay?"

"…Saku, Shika works there."

"Ino, tomorrow is Shikamaru's day off."

"…DAMMIT!"

"Right."

"…What's your plan?" she asks.

I smirk. "You'll see…you'll see…"

'FOREHEAD! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!"

"…you'll see…you'll see…"

"FOREHEAD! ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME? FORE-"

_Click_.

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

_Temari POV._

"Hey, Tema…?"

'Yeah Sakura?"

"Can you do me a reeeeeeealllllllly big favor?"

I frown. "What is it?"

"I need you to pick up Bells. I, umm, accidentally left him at home, and one of the cute guys from…oh right you weren't there. Anyways, there's a REEEEEALLLLLLLLLY cute guy here and Sia is practically having a heart attack. So…can you pick him up?"

"you left him at home? You never do that!" I say. Something was off.

"I was late this morning and I guess I just forgot. Please, Tema, PLEASE!"

"…Fine."

"Great," She says. "Later!"

_Click_.

My hand closes my phone and I look in a mirror, my eyes narrowing.

Something was _definitely _up.

I sigh, tucking my phone in my pocket, grabbing my keys, and head out the door.

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

I knew there would be a day when I would be glad that I gave all my girlfriends a key to my house.

"'Ey, Ino!" I call to the blond, working at the cashier.

"C'mon over, Saku," She replies, not even looking up from the pad of paper she's currently studying.

"Tema is currently making her way over I repeat Tema is currently making her way over." And then I make one of those funny walkie-talkie noises that sounds kinda like _kch_.

"…Sakura."

"Yeah?"

"Please don't do that EVER again."

"Pssh. Whatever. Where's Shikamaru, oh-smart-one?" I ask, eyes narrowing.

"Coming," She says smugly. "He'll be here in…oh…about…now."

"Troublesome," A voice confirms her sentence.

"Pssh. Whatever," I say again.

Sia runs over to me, flustered as hell. "Ohmy_god_, Sakura, Ino, I totallyneedtotalktoyou_two!_" She gasps, dragging us away as Temari enters the café.

"The redhead guy I have a crush on?" She says.

"Yeah?" We both say.

"His name is Gaara. He's Temari's younger brother!"

"What. The HELL?" Ino whisper-yelps.

"…Good thing Temari is bringing Bells over," I say. "Once she and Shikamaru are together, we can work Bells' magic on Gaara…"

Sia continues to flush.

The three of us turn our gaze over to Temari and Shikamaru, who are talking animatedly now.

…Well, as animatedly as a lazy guy can talk animatedly.

_**

* * *

**_

My Cat the Matchmaker

_

* * *

_

Temari POV.

"Eh? Temari, what are you doing here? Troublesome," mutters a voice to my left.

I turn around, Bells in my arms, and see the face of Shikamaru.

…_Ugh where the hell is Sakura?_

"Yo," I say calmly.

"Why are you here?' He asks.

"I'm here to give Sakura Bellls…but I can't find her."

"She and Ino were here a second ago," He groans. "Troublesome women…"

"Really? Where'd they go?" I ask.

"I dunno," He mutters. He then looks up at me and smirks.

"Troublesome women…" He mutters, throwing a look to the left.

I'm utterly confused. "Uh…"

Shikamaru unfolds himself, grabs my shoulders, and bends me down over him, sealing our lips together.

_Uh…wow…_ is all I could think as his lips press hard against mine.

"MRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW!" is all we hear before Bells unleashes his fury on us, demanding that we let go of him.

I drop him on the counter, and turn my attention back to Shikamaru, kissing him forcefully.

He smirks against the kiss and, being lazy again, lets me do all the work.

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

"Hey Temari! Thanks for bringing-whoooooa," I say.

Temari blushes furiously. "SAKURA! I'M GONNA GET YOU FOR THIS!"

"AGH! SIA! HELP ME! HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" I squeal, running away as fast as I can.

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**_Listen 2 Me Complain in the Author's Notes:_**

**Actually, I really don't have that much to complain about in this chapter-I thought it was really smooth and everything.**

**...I have no idea what I'm talking about.**

**-cough-**

**Now that that has been cleared up...let's talk about some key points in this chapter!**

**...Shut up.**

**I'm the author.**

**I can do what I like.**

**ANYWAYS!**

**If you are having a hard time believeing that Shikamaru would figure out what they were planning...**

**DUDE (TTE)! HE'S A GENIUS!**

**Of _course_ he would figure it out.**

**And of course Temari would be suspicious! Sakura _never_ leaves Bells at home!**

**A-_duh_.**

**So we're over halfway done with this story-YESSSSS! Another one I can check off on my checklist.**

**Only one more chapter that I have to write, and three more to post! xD**

**I've had fun writing this.**

**It's my baby...**

**SHUT UP! **

**...**

**-coughs-**

**Anyways...yeah...**

**Please leave a review!**

**BUT NOT A FLAME!**

**Because me and my friends from the Naruto world and the Bleach world will hunt you down.**

**(why Bleach...? ...I dunno.)**

**Ja ne!**

**Lady Maybelle of Confusion**


	6. I'm Gonna Drop This Cat on Your Head Now

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

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_**I'm Gonna Drop This Cat On Your Head Now.**_

"So…what's our course of action?" Ino asks as the two of them huddle around me.

"…Shush. I'm thinking," I reprimand them.

"…Sakura," Ino says.

"Hmmm?"

'you're not the boss of me."

"…I'm a leader."

"So am I."

"Well-"

"HELLO?" Sia shouts, and cuffs us both over the head.

The result is instantaneous.

"OW! FUCK!" I whisper-shout.

"Sakura, you really should watch your language," Ino smirks.

I follow Sia's example and cuff her over the head.

"OW! FUCK!" She shouts.

"Ino, you really should watch you language," I smirk.

She glares at me.

"Enough! Let's focus!" Sia says, thumping her fist on a cushion.

We're hiding in one of the booths, underneath the table (don't ask, please, just…don't) that Hinata is currently cleaning said table, keeping watch for us.

"Hmmm…I think I should 'accidentally' dump Bells on his lap, and walk away, leaving you to pick up the pieces."

"…Sounds good to me," Ino says.

"What do you think, Hinata?"

"…I don't know, Sakura-chan. Your crazy plans have worked before."

'Rightie! Thanks Saku-chan!" Sia pops up from underneath the table and walks away.

It takes a moment for her words to sink in.

"DON'T CALL ME SAKU-CHAN, DAMMIT!"

"OK SAKU-KUN!"

"SIA I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!"

Unfortunately, I was unable to, since I slammed my head on the table above me and tripped over Hinata.

* * *

**_My Cat the Matchmaker_**

* * *

Efficiently 'dropping' Bells off at Gaara's table and walking off without looking backwards and them, I smile evilly to myself, joining Ino once more at the cash register to watch the "show".

Temari shows up. 'Sakura-"

"Shush."

"I won't shush, DAMMIT! That was UNCALLED for-"

"Temari. I'm TRYING to watch Bells work his magic on Sia and your little brother. Now will you _please_ shut UP?"

"Gaara's here?" She asks. "And how do you know about him?"

"I have my ways. Now SHUT UP and watch," I say, pointing.

"Hmmm," Ino says. "Good, good."

"Hmm?"

"She just used a flirting pointer I gave her."

"Ah."

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

_

* * *

_

Sia POV.

I flush lightly as I continue to apologize/flirt as the redhead that is SO hot holds Bells, not really looking pissed off that Sakura dropped a cat on his head, on "accident". OK, well he looks a little pissed, but…

Eh. Whatever.

"I'm SO sorry-"

"you've said that five times now," He murmurs, petting Bells' head lightly. Bells purrs in contentment. My eyes widen a fraction, and then I smile.

"Well, then. Is there anything else I can get for you?" I say, flashing him one of my most irresistible smiles.

He smirks. "Yeah. Your cell phone number."

"Eh?" I say, blinking rapidly, looking confused. Whoa…I had _not_ expected this. Just a little back and forth, but…

He smirks again. "I. Would. Like. Your. Phone. Number," He drawls. I hear a squeal behind me, but I ignore it.

"Uh…why?"

He looks at me. "I'm not blind. You're hot."

"…" I rack my brain, trying to figure out what to do next. Temari had told me about her brother, and apparently, he WAS NOT FORWARD. So…

"Ummm…" Suddenly an idea pops into my head. "Sorry. I'm not allowed to give out phone numbers while I'm on duty."

"Well I guess I'll just have to come back later, huh?" He says, still smirking. He moves Bells off his lap, stands up, handing me a twenty to cover his bill, and smirking once more.

"I guess."

"See ya later then." But before he goes, his arm wraps around my waist, and he gives me a light peck on the lips.

I stand there in shock as he exits the café. I look at the twenty (which is _more_ than enough) and notice that there's another paper.

Written there, scrawled hastily, is a phone number, and, below it…

_Call me. –Gaara._

I smile gently.

HA! I WIN!

* * *

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

* * *

"So?" I ask as Sia enters the kitchen.

She waves a piece of paper in the air. "Got his phone number!"

"WHAT?" Ino shrieked.

"He asked me for mine, then gave me his," She smirks.

"YOU ARE SO LUCKY!" Ino shrills.

"Thanks, I know."

"So did you give him yours?" Hinata asks.

"Nope."

"WHY NOT?"

"I told him that 'I wasn't allowed to give out phone numbers while on duty' and that 'he would have to come back later.'"

"You're a sneak!" I gasp.

"Yup. I know," She smirks.

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**_So...Time For Me To Talk:_**

**Hi again! Back with another chapter! We have two more chapters to go (and I have one more chapter to write... -sweatdrops-) until this story ends.**

**EEK!**

**I was so mad this whole week, because my Internet wasn't working properly. It drove me nuts. I was practically _begging_ my parents to go get it fixed. Finally my parents relented! And I have my Internet back! YAY! I am _so_ awesome at persuading people...**

**So. Ya...let's talk about this chapter. -sweatdrops-**

**First of all, I apologize if you have not read one of my other stories with Sia in it...Yeah, Gaara and Sia are a _little_ weird together, but they're cute...together. Because we all know Gaara is not _cute_, but _manly_, because he's a man... **

**-cough-**

**Ignore that please. I tend to ramble about absolutely nothing!**

**Anyways! So I apologize if this chapter left you like "...uh...what...just...happened...?"**

**I tend to do that a lot...**

**HA! Sakura "dropped" Bells on Gaara's head. I would be pissed...**

**...**

**It will probably take at least another half a week or more for the next chapter (SASUSAKU!) to come out, since I promised myself I wouldn't write chapter number eight before releasing chapter number nine...Don't ask, because...**

**Eh. Whatever.**

**Yes. The next chapter is Sasuke and Sakura...and then comes the last chapter, which is ShikaTema, SaiIno, NaruHina, NejiTen, GaaOC, and SasuSaku all together. Which will be a hassle to write, but oh well.**

**...I have issues. I was trying to write 'GaaOC' but kept writing 'GaaPC'. Don't ask. My fingers are just on a riot right now, I guess...**

**CRUSH! CRUSH! CRUSH!...sorry.**

**Please review and tell me what your thoughts were about this chapter.**

**But no flames!**

**I will be _very_ pissed off at you if I get a flame from you.**

**And you _DON'T_ want me to be pissed.**

**(although, actually, I already am...)**

**Ja ne til next chapter!**

**Lady Maybelle of Confusion**

**(p.s OH MY GOD! I TOTALLY FORGOT! I have not been thanking all my reviewers, but this chapter, I swore I would thank them...so...THANK YOU vampireizzy, PhantomSoul103, Me and Gaara 4ever, Saya'z Sasu9, Animecherryblossem33, kerapal bubbles, totalnarutofangirl85, wildheart of shadowclan! You all rule...!)**


	7. With The Cat Behind Us In The House

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

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_**With the Cat Behind us in the House**_

"Really?"

"Yup. They want to meet you and the infamous Bells."

"They know about Bells?" I ask, once more in the bathroom, doing my nails.

"I guess," Sia says. "I MIGHT'VE mentioned it to them. But, anyways, they want you to come for dinner tomorrow night."

"Ugh. I don't know," I tease. "My schedule is REALLY locked up…hmmmm…"

I can just picture Sia rolling her eyes. "Saku-kun, just come."

"SHUT UP! STOP CALLING ME SAKU-KUN!"

"Fine Saku-chan."

"SIA!"

"What? You told me to stop calling you Saku-kun."

"Sia…if you keep this up…I'm not coming," I say.

"PleasePLEASE_pleasePLEASE__**pleasePLEASE?**_"

"Jeez, fine, way to be demanding!"

"YAY! …ITACHI, TELL MOM AND DAD THAT SAKURA'S COMING! You are bringing Bells, right?"

"Mmmhmmm."

"AND THAT SHE'S BRINGING BELLS!"

"Y'know…" I say. "This will be the first time I'll be meeting your family."

"Uh-huh! You've met Sasuke…"

"YES, SASU, I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU…"

"I'LL CALL YOU SASU IF I WANT TOO…"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH 'TACHI SASUKE'S BEING MEAN…"

"I'm back."

"I gathered that," I say dryly. "But I REALLY wouldn't consider that day in the café meeting him."

'Really? I would."

'That's because you're _weird!_"

"Thanks," She says evenly. "…NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! STOP INVADING MY ROOM! GET OUT, GET OUT! REMOVE THYSELVES!"

_Beep_.

"Give me the phone."

"STOP BEING MEAN, 'TACHI!"

"…Uh…Sia…?" I ask.

Dead silence.

"'TACHI! YOU MADE IT GO ON SPEAKERPHONE! YAY!"

I sweatdrop. Sia's really crazy sometimes.

"Hnn. Why didn't you do that from the beginning?" A deep voice asks.

"SHUT UP SASU!"

"DON'T CALL ME SASU!"

'I WILL IF I WANT TO!"

"YEAH, WELL-"

I sit there in silence, listening to the Uchiha siblings argue.

Sia's voice startles me out of my dreamlike trance. "…Saku-kun?"

"SHUT UP! DON'T CALL ME SAKU-KUN!" I scream into the phone.

Dead silence.

"Ow my ear hurts," says what sounds like Sia's voice.

"Well, we know now that Sasuke isn't the only one who hates being nicknamed by Sia," says a deep voice that I assume is Itachi.

"SHUT UP ITACHI!" Sasuke and Sia chorus.

"Sia…?"

"YOU'RE SUCH A JERK! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE MY BROTHER!"

"Sia, I'm hanging up now!"

She still doesn't pay attention.

_Click_.

* * *

**_My Cat the Matchmaker_**

* * *

Looking at myself in the mirror, I frown slightly as I fix my ponytail, pulling my dark jeans up a bit and smoothing my white shirt and red tank top.

…What? Wearing that damned uniform has gotten me used to wearing layers!

I slip on some red flats, grab my keys and purse and head downstairs.

"Mrrrrroooooowwww," Bells meows as a horn honks outside. I sigh, and kick the door open, dumping Bells in my purse before slamming the door shut.

"SAKU-CHAN! HURRY UP!"

I growl. "SIA! SHUT UP!"

And that's when I realize that (_omg omg) _Sia's _brothers _are in the car.

Her. Hot. Brothers.

Yes.

HOT.

Like, SMOKIN' hot.

I slid into the car next to Sia, who hugs me.

"The driver is Itachi," She says. "He's my older, annoying brother."

Itachi looks at me in the mirror. "Hi," I say.

"Hnn."

I sweatdrop.

"And that's Sasuke," She says, pointing to the passenger's seat. 'He's younger then me."

"Hnn," Sasuke smirks.

I simply roll my eyes.

"Mrrrrooooowwwww," says Bells.

Sasuke looks at Bells. "Hnn," He says.

"Yes, that was the cat that was at the café," Sia rolls her eyes. She whispers to me, "You think they would learn by now, right, Saku-kun?"

"SIA! SHUT UP!" I hit her over the head.

She starts to sob, curling into a ball.

"…I like her,' Itachi announces.

"Sob," Sia says.

_**

* * *

**_

My Cat the Matchmaker

* * *

The next thing I know, I'm being whisked into this god-huge mansion.

"So, how do you like it?" Sia asks.

"…Big," I say. Itachi and Sasuke smirk. Sia laughs.

"You get used to it…" She says. She opens her mouth.

Itachi and Sasuke cover their ears. I blink, confused.

"_**MOM! DAD! WE'RE BACK! AND WE'VE BROUGHT SAKURA AND BELLS!!**_" Sia screechs.

…Ow. My ears.

"FUDGE! DO YOU HAVE TO BE _THAT LOUD_?" I scream at her.

"WELL WHAT DO YOU SUGGEST?"

"HOW ABOUT LEARNING TO USE YOUR CELL PHONE PROPERLY??"

"…SHUT UP, SAKU-KUN!"

"SIA! I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!"

And that's when we start our mock fight, which is how her parents find us.

Oh.

Man.

The two of us jump back and I smile sheepishly.

Her mother says nothing about it, instead just extending her hand. "You must be Sakura. I'm Mikoto, Sia's mother."

"Uh. Hi," I say, grasping her hand.

"And this is my husband, Fugaku," She smiles.

"Hnn."

I sweatdrop. Sia smiles, whispering in my ear as the six of us enter the dining room, "You see where they get it from?"

"Mmmmhmmm."

She laughs.

**_

* * *

_**

My Cat the Matchmaker

* * *

OK, I am _officially _creeped out by Sia's family.

First off, her dad hasn't said, like, a _single_ word.

DON'T TELL ME THAT'S NOT CREEPY!

YOU KNOW IT IS!

Itachi is being a freaking _stalker_. He, like, knows almost everything about me…

FREAKY!

Sia is being Sia…which is a). She's weird, b). She's always hyper, and c). She's random.

And Sasuke has been staring at me throughout the entire meal.

…He's hot, though.

It _almost_ makes up for the creepiness and the staring.

…Almost.

Right.

"Well, thanks for dinner, but Bells and I have to get going now," I say, after aforementioned cat had got fawned over.

"I'll drive you home," says Sasuke.

…I TOLD YOU!

Dude, he is_ so_ creeping me out!

"…Uh…thanks…"

"BYE SAKU-KUN!"

"SIA! SHUT YOUR FACE!" I scream, turning around.

She just smiles and shuts the door in my face.

"Sia? SIA? SIA OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW DAMMIT!"

"Have a nice trip home Saku-kun!"

"SIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

****

_My Cat the Matchmaker_

His car pulls up to the driveway and I hop out neatly. I turn around to get Bells but the next thing I know, Sasuke has Bells and is walking up to my front door, having kicked the door shut.

I blink.

"…Er…"

He looks at me. "Well? I don't have your keys."

I run around the car and dash up to my house I open the door, and Bells goes running in.

I turn around to thank Sasuke, but I nearly jump and slam my head on the doorway because his body is _so close to mine and omg-_

"…You're cute," He smirks, leaning even farther forward.

Blink. Blink.

"What?"

He smirks, rubs a thumb across my face, leans in, _kisses me_, passes me his phone number, and goes walking back towards his car.

I stand there staring even as his car revves off in the distance.

"Hey-wait-WHAT?" I screech.

**_XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX_**

**_And Now, The AUthor Will Lecture About Her 'Fabulous' Piece Of Work:_**

**Hi everybody...**

**Second to last chapter!**

**Oh my god.**

**I'm gonna miss this.**

**(But, no fear, this has inspired me to write something like this again)**

**Oh well.**

**I'm about a sixth of the way (or less) done with the eighth chapter. It's solid enough to say it will take at least a month (i think) since school is starting next week for me. Sob.**

**Anyways, it's the SasuSaku chapter! YAYZ! This took me _forever_ to do. I was so busy...sob...sob...I had restless nights about this chapter.**

**...OK, not really, but, hey, whatever.**

**DRAMATIC EFFECT! xD.**

**Awwwww Sasu has a crush on Saku.**

**How sweet.**

**He even offered to drive her home!**

**THAT IS SO SWEET!**

**_Inner Maybelle; And cliche._**

**SHUT UP! WHAT DO YOU KNOW! -shoves I.M into a box and throws it into the ocean-**

**Yes, before you all beat me up, I _know_ that there is not much SasuSaku ness in this chapter. They will get (officially) together (ish) next chapter, so _please_ don't break my bones, alrightie?**

**Good.**

**Thank you reviewers! And that would be kerapal bubbles, Kaydreams, randomhottiexoxo, omgwho.amiagain, sakka san, Animecherryblossem33 (HA! I DID NOT FORGET YOU THIS TIME! YES!), Saya'z Sasu9, totalnarutofangirl85, Minion 101 (yes she would...probably...)! THANKIES!**

**God.**

**Next chapter is probably going to take up, like, twenty word document pages...sob...sob... -goes and crawls in emo corner-**

**Please review!**

**But no flames!**

**Thanks!**

**Ja ne,**

**Lady Maybelle of Confusion**


	8. Wait You left him at Home?

_**My Cat the Matchmaker**_

**_xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx_**

_**Wait. You left him at home?**_

I slowly blink. Sunlight streams in through my bedroom windows and I groan in discontentment.

My phone buzzes and I look at it.

"What do you want, who are you, and why the hell did you wake me up at seven in the morning?"

"GOOD MORNING SAKU-KUN!"

"Sia. Shut up."

"Today's the perfect day for our plans! I can't believe it turned out to be such a perfect day! EVERYTHING'S GOING TO BE GREAT!"

My brain was not awake enough to process what she was saying. I huff. "Sia…what plans?"

"…The humongo group date?"

"OH MY GOD! THAT'S TODAY?" I bolt out of bed, landing on the floor.

'OOF!"

"…Saku-kun, are you alright?"

"NO! AND STOP CALLING ME THAT! AND DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT CALLING ME SAKU-CHAN!"

"…Fine…" I could basically hear the pout in her voice.

"Who's picking me up?"

"Me and Sasu."

"…Uh. OK."

"We haven't left yet."

"Can you wait for at least half an hour?"

'Ten minutes?"

"Fifteen?"

'Alright, fine."

"Great." _Click_.

I tossed my phone on the bed and threw my closet doors open.

Light jeans. Check.

Emerald green tank top that matches my eyes.

Check.

Black, soft-over shirt.

Check.

Green Converse.

Check.

Alrightie.

I threw the whole ensemble on, did my makeup, rushed down the stairs, grabbed breakfast, my purse, and walked out the door just as Sia and Sasuke pulled up.

"Greetings earthling!" Sia gave me a thumbs-up and grinned.

"SHUT UP SIA!" I yell at her as I jump into the car.

We're almost there when Sia says, "Where's Bells?"

Wait.

_**WHAT?**_

"OH MY GOD, I LEFT HIM AT HOME!" I shriek.

Sasuke smirks at me.

"No worries…everything will be fine…I think…" Sia tries to comfort me.

"Everything will _not_ be OK! But it's too late to turn back…"

And it was. Because at that moment, we pulled into a beach/picnic-like-area's parking lot.

As soon as we get out, everyone's surrounding us.

"FOREHEAD!"

"Yo ino-pig."

"Ugh…billboard brow…"

"Heh. Stupid boar."

"THAT'S IT! I'M GONNA-!" Thankfully she didn't, because Sai and Temari held her back.

"Troublesome."

"SHUT UP!" Ino and Temari slapped him over the head.

"G-guys? Can we stop fighting and eat?"

"HINA'S RIGHT! LET'S ALL BE FRIENDS!" Sia chirps, wrapping an arm around my neck and her other one around Sasuke's.

I mumble incoherent things as she drags both of her prisoners (me and Sasuke) toward the picnic table.

'So. Where's the prize cat?' Sai asks.

Dead silence.

Everyone looks at me.

"Well…you see…' I start.

"She accidentally left him at home," smirks Sasuke from my left.

Sia whacks him over the head. "Enough, Sasukle!"

Sasuke chokes on his sandwich. "Sasukle?"

"Yes! Sasukle!"

"WTF?" asks my date.

'…Please don't ask that question around her," I say, interrupting. "You're her brother. You should know better."

Sasuke gives me a look. Naruto snickers.

I glare at him, and, under the table, kick him in the shin.

"OW! Holy-"

"Shut up Naruto! We're in a park with little kids!" Ino reprimands him.

"Tch…they're gonna hear it one day…"

"Naruto! Don't ruin the innocence of little kids!" Tenten says. "It's not nice."

"…Ummm…Naruto's nice?" Sia asks.

The guys all chuckle. Naruto pouts, and even Hinata hides a giggle under her hand.

"Hey! I am too nice!" Naruto grumbles.

"Yar yar yar," Sia and Temari say on cue.

"Ok…enough…" Gaara mutters, hand on Sia's shoulder.

"Troublesome," mutters Shikamaru.

_Whack! Whack! Slap!_

We all look at Sia. "What was that for?"

She shrugs. "I dunno…I just want to be part of the group…"

"Heh. Dickless. Beat up by three girls."

"SHUT UP SAI!" all six of us girls yell.

"I DO TOO HAVE A DICK!"

Dead silence.

"Oh my frickin' god."

* * *

**_My Cat the Matchmaker_**

* * *

"Well. That was fun," I say. I'm standing on my front porch, and Sasuke's standing next to me.

He smirks. "Yeah…"

"Although…I kinda of wish it had lasted longer."

"Stupid dobe. Got us kicked out."

"Wouldn't you kick us out too, if someone yelled 'dick' in the middle of a family park?"

"…Hnn…"

I giggled. "Thanks for dropping me off."

"See you on Tuesday," He murmurs, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to my lips. He then turns around, hands jammed into his pockets.

"DON'T BE LATE!" I shout after him.

"Hnn."

I open the door. There's Bells, smirking smugly.

"_Mrow._"

"Oh shut up," I blush.

Yeah. Life was good.

**_THE END_**

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**_The End The End Rant: _**

**Oh.**

**My.**

**Gosh.**

**It's the end! The last chapter!**

**(finally)**

**It only took me a month and a half to write it...eh heh heh... -rubs back of head sheepishly-**

**OK...so there's like a week between this chapter and chapter seven (in the story...). **

**And Sasuke and Sakura are together.**

**Who knows how he wooed her?**

**Maybe a poem?**

**...Or not...**

**But. Yeah. They're officially (ish) together and he hasn't changed his 'hnn'-ing ways.**

**Oh well. That's what makes Sasuke Sasuke!**

**THANK YOU ONE AND ALL WHO REVIEWED! Without you, this story would've been discarded to the lower pits of hell.**

**xD.**

**Thank you Theblackroseofkonoha, randomly-creative, waveblader213, Saya'z Sasu9, Minion 101, Animecherryblossem33, Me and Gaara 4ever, Kaydreams, randomhottiexoxo, totalnarutofangirl85 and kerapal bubbles!**

**So...this story is officially over!**

**...How is it possible?**

**(Magic!)**

**Anyways...thank you one and all.**

**Ja ne, **

**Lady Maybelle of Confusion**


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